July 9, 2012

We found ourselves in a Hollywood bar that was a little fancier than we had first thought. The bartender, for instance, wasn’t a bartender but one of those new fangled mixologist fellas. He had a silly mustache and way too much product in his faux hawk. He was wearing suspenders, a bow tie, and a peculiar button down shirt with sleeves rolled up to the shoulders. He looked like he was going to a costume party dressed as an old timey banker from the Wild West. The loud, obnoxious woman he was serving was wearing a curious mixture of haute couture and derby doll fashion and was old enough to know better. Her gay sidekick was in his 30s and an intern at Prada. They were fashion snobs. They just loved the mixologist’s ensemble and were curious what labels he was wearing.

“Oh this?” the mixologist said feigning indifference. “I have no idea. My STYLIST just put this out for me this morning.”

The woman—and indeed everyone at the bar—was aghast. “You have a stylist?” she said surprised.

“Chuh! In this town?” the mixologist huffed. “Are you kidding me? Like, seriously.”

And do we have a stylist for you, buster: his name is Erik Ellington and these are the clothes he picked out for you this morning. Like, seriously! Truth be told, Erik is not a stylist and he picked these out for himself. These are Erik’s clothes, but he cordially invites you to experience the Erik Ellington Signature Collection from KR3W. (Twenty-dollar cocktails not included.)

[Note: Please do not say that Erik, or anyone for that matter, is your stylist. Anyone who brags about having a stylist is a douche pickle. Just wear the clothes Erik picked out for you and shut up. We can’t help what comes out of your mouth, but at least you won’t look stupid when you’re wearing KR3W.]